I’m afraid of states that being with the letter A. They creep me out, they give me the heebeegeebee’s and frankly I think I’m going to avoid them altogether.

Why? Well, let me explain:

Alaska:

Two words, one person: Sarah Palin. Even saying the name gives me the shudders. If her cheesy jokes and contrived persona weren’t enough, she’s admitted to jumping the border and using the Canadian health care system for free. NOT cool, we pay a lot of taxes for that freeby – I think we should send her a bill.

Image from this guy.

Arizona:

The hate people. As a non-resident alien in the US I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to live in Arizona. And the more I think about it, the worse it gets. You see, the chances that I’d get stopped and asked for my immigration papers is next to nothing. Why? Because I don’t look like an immigrant. And let’s be honest,  it’s because I’m a white female with no decipherable accent – at least until you ask me to say things like Z(ed) and about. So what about everyone else? Not just legal immigrants, but natural born US citizens that may “appear” illegal and get stopped. I can see this policy getting out of hand and become what I call the “Arizona witch hunt for outsiders” I’m afraid of Arizona.

Alabama:

I’m afraid of Alabama for one simple reason – this guy.

He scares the daylights out of me. Not only does his horse give you the evil eye, but he randomly produces a shot gun, and he says things like “dummy” and “give a rip”. Maybe it’s that I don’t understand the concept of the right to carry guns, but what does a shot gun have to with the politics of agriculture? Is he going to shoot at crops that aren’t doing well? Run little stock of wheat, he’s after you. And what is the point of the horse? If you disagree with him, is he going to send his horse to intimidate you with that stink eye? I’m officially afraid of all horses from Alabama.

Oh and since he is concerned that “illegals are being bussed in by the thousands” to work on farms, I offer him THIS by the United Farm Workers. And please don’t forget to pay close attention to the warning marked by the Astrix under the sign up button.

Arkansas:

Okay so I’m not really scared of Arkansas – just confused. It’s pronounced RKansaw but it’s spelt RKansas. Confused.